Life is all about the choices~!

life
Originally uploaded by sharonkee10

Continuing from my previous blog, my friend chat with me over MSN 4 days ago and talked to me that most of time, we live for other people instead of us living for ourselves.

When we were small, our parents taught us everything on what we should do, and what we should not do or cannot do. When we reached the age of 18/19, it was the moment we want to make a choice on what to do next in our life. Again it is our parents that appeared on our path and asked us to study this and that. Sometimes, their intention is really good, but for some situations, it is too pressuring and burdening for us already. The guidance which were given by them is the life that they wanted, but not the life that we want to have for ourselves. The careers suggested by them to us maybe is their dream career. Really it is not ours.

I had an experience before when I became a counsellor during my college open day. I met a student with his parents who came over to our college seeking for guidance regarding the courses which are offered in our campus. What happened was the mother asked the son to study Software Engineering course, because she felt that course will have a very good future and high salary. On the other side, his father wanted him to study Business Information System course because he felt that the course is combining double major where his son can learn more things and able to have even brighter future. The son was sitting in the middle of them, looking left and right don't know what to choose. After that, I advised them to go back and think carefully. I emphasized to them that they should let their son make the choice based on his interest. If you WERE that son, what would you have done? Have you ever experience this kind of situations when your parents or somebody else trying to control over your choices, options and path in your life?

My student said, he was interested in becoming a vet initially. But due to his good result and his parent's "advice", he lost his faith and passion in his ambitions and dreams. I guess our Asian culture is different from American or European culture. Asian parents always directing their children what they have to do. Asians parents are in a way materialistic due to the nature of the country's policy and Asian culture of "kiasi" and "kiasu".

Study, work (must be of a high pay job), get married, have children, retire, getting older just like them, then slowly waiting to die. We all following the fixed "life formulas" that is already arranged nicely and properly thought out by our beloved parents. We never really live the life we wanted. No freedom to make the important life choices. We live because what others think how we should live.

But have you wondering that is this the choice of life that you *really* want? Or you just merely following the path that your parents had given to you just because you don't want to disappoint them and don't want to appear not filial to your parents? Sometimes, your parents may threathen you just so that you can follow their paths. They may even threathened to disown you.

My brother is very talented in drawing comics and cartoons. But due to our country's limited career choices and pressure from my parents, he ended up giving up his interest and study IT instead. So pathetic! Just because we want to make our parents happy and have no regrets in their life, but how about us? Don't they consider our own regrets? Sometimes our parents killed our dreams and aspirations indirectly because we regretted following their paths which is not what we wanted. How many REGRETS do we have?

When we are getting older and looking back what we have done, what we have chosen, we may feel a lot of regrets because these are not the choices or paths that we selected. Instead, we are just in the process of making other people happy. We live for others' people dreams and happiness, but not ours. In the end, we suffer silently and not happy.

Life is all about choices, When we cut away all those junks, every situation is a choice. We choose how we react to situations. We choose how people will affect our mood. We choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It's our choice how we live our life.

Life choices~
Originally uploaded by sharonkee10

Start to ponder now. What path would you like to have in your life?